My Angola hen's night (bachelorette party)

On Friday night Joel and I had our stag/doe, bachelor/bachelorette parties (I know it's also called a hen's night for women, but is the male version really a rooster party?). Because I am not a big fan of the drive into the city, and even less so the drive BACK from the city when it's late and you're drunk and just ready for bed, I asked that my party be held on campus. It made for a less crazy night than it could have been, but, well, I'm ok with that. Joel and the boys on the other hand, went into the city. When Joel got home he could do nothing more than grunt at me, drop his clothes where he took them off, and fall into bed. I guess he had a good night.

Anyway, I don't have pictures of Joel's night- and I don't think most of us would want to see em anyway- but I do have pictures of my night! So, here they are...

Oh first, an uninvited guest, bleh.

The table of booze- which was a plethora of "tropical cocktails" to match the theme

The decorations were hung in the trees. Fun. :)

Of course the jasmine itself is decoration!

One of the party guests relaxing and having a drink

Another...same thing... :)

Once more people arrived, the games started. The first one was that in small groups the girls made me both a bouquet and a headdress out of available materials.

Working hard...

Look at all that concentration!

Monica showing off her group's bouquet

T showing off her groups headdress

H showing off her groups bouquet

Although I did try on all three in succession, here I am modeling one while two other girls model the other choices- of course, an objective judge had to choose which one I would wear, for the rest of the night!

The final choice- and yes, the idea was precisely to give me a go at looking like I had big jugs for a night.

After that first game, there was another one where I had to answer a set of questions that Joel had answered earlier in the week- obviously, the goal being giving the same answer that he would give. I did ok, but not well enough- had to do a shot afterwards as penance. Then I sat down and chatted with the ladies.

The last game was a bachelorette party take on the well known kids game, Pin the Tail on the Donkey- our version was Plant the Kiss on Brad. (much more fun)

So first, I was blindfolded, and then had bright red lipstick applied...

Looking good...

Then, even though I had at least two drinks and a shot, and was well enough tipsy, I got spun 10 times!!! Everyone thought it was hilarious, except of course me, who really could barely stand up straight afterwards!

Checking out where my kiss landed- totally off to the side... :(

So I took my open-eyed liberty!

C takes her turn at the game

And Monica...

And B...

And J...

And the other J... :)

And H!

And finally the party planner herself took at stab...

After all that- if only he was real...

That was the end of the games that pictures were taken of. We continued on with a whole lot of chatting about things girls chat about- our men, our bodies, food, our men, sex.... :) It was a nice night. I headed home around 2 actually quite sober- which was good, because there was only room for one of us on the couch on Saturday- and Joel needed it much more than I did!

So, that was my Angolan hen's night- it was fun, but I have to say, I am looking forward to a night like this with all my old, at home friends...you know, it's just different. So girls... don't think you're off the hook! :)

On being a modern woman...

I won't lie, the fact that my nuptials are approaching has been making a lot of stuff come up for me- some of it good, some bad, some ugly. I hope it's not a bad, but rather a natural thing. Joel has been good enough to put up with my incessant desire to talk about things and to share things with me when I need him to.

Last night, we were chatting about some stuff, and some thoughts came up for me about why I might be facing some of the difficulties I have been. (I feel like I've blogged about this before at some point, but I couldn't find where, so, I'll write it down again...)

Anyway.... growing up, possibly because I did start dating rather young (I went out with the same boy for a whole year when I was in 8th grade/13 years old), I was always told, that you shouldn't focus all your energy "on a man". Of course, it makes sense that when you're 13, or 16 or even 19- you should be doing lots of other things in your life, and just worrying about being involved or trying to stay involved would not be a good thing.

As a young woman, I received a constant message of, "be independent", "chase your own dreams", "don't rely on a man", even, "don't let a man be the most important thing".

But here is the thing- here I am at age 28, heading towards my wedding, and suddenly, inexplicably, the rules seemed to have changed- now it's, "your husband should be your best friend".

How do you go from never putting a man in first place, never relying on a man, to having him be your best friend?

I cried to Joel last night that sometimes I just worry about leaning on him too much, about needing him too much- of course he giggled at me, and said he'd always be there, and that I shouldn't worry, that I *can* lean on him.

When I look back, I think I might have worried about boys too much in general when I was young, lost sleep over them, cried about them, just thought about them too much! But then, it didn't stop me from getting great grades, playing volleyball, being in musicals, being in the National Honor Society (even being the secretary one year), I earned money babysitting (no I didn't have a real job til I went to college)- I got the full ride academic scholarship for university. But then, even in uni- I worked, I still got great grades (there might have only been one semester I wasn't on the Dean's list), I pursued my dreams in general-- and yeah, I dated, I fell in love, I had my heart broken a few times, I even slipped into mild depression now and then (my poor roommates...), but through it all, I don't think I ever really gave up on myself or my dreams.

And then of course, after university, I think I made a pretty bold choice about going to China. It was a big move to make- and this one thing, I have to admit was partially man-motivated. I desperately needed to get away from an ex and a whole life that I had that involved him in so many ways- I saw him everywhere I went in that town, I couldn't stop thinking about him, and I needed to get away from it. I needed to get away from him. And I did. And I couldn't have picked a better place to NOT find a man. Well, ok, I found men, but in two years in China, I certainly didn't find anyone worth the time I spent on them. Which is unfortunate, because I did spend quite a bit of time on one of them.

Anyway, the point is, it seems that actually, I have done pretty well to follow those rules of not putting a man in the first place- although probably, I just spent way too much energy and emotion on men- which is maybe why I was always getting the "talks" from all the important women in my life about it all. I guess in an odd way, my actions never really matched up to my words, in that although emotionally I might have been consumed by men, I didn't let it stop me from DOING things- which maybe is the important thing? I don't know.

But anyway, at this point, I am simply finding it difficult to transition from one set of rules to the next! And it just feels like the trap that one modern woman might find herself falling into.

I was thinking the other day that had I met my first really serious boyfriend in 1794, or 1894 instead of 1994, I probably would have married him, by now I would have a herd of children, and well, life would be very, very different. Maybe it wouldn't have happened that way, because back in those days, I wouldn't have been able to choose a mate-- but, the point is, it seems like life has to some extent just become that much more complicated. Sometimes rules seem to make life easier- and now that we have no rules- well, there are still rules, but maybe they are more subtle, which just makes everything very complicated, no?

I don't know- but I wonder, am I the only "modern woman" finding it difficult to transition emotionally from single-dom to couple-dom? Because you know, the physical part of this transition has been easy as pie- nothing ever felt so natural as to share a space with Joel (yes, the first and only guy I have ever lived with)- which is funny, because I'm pretty sure, joining our lives up physically was indeed quite difficult for him. Getting used to having someone around all the time wasn't easy for him. But for me, it was easy, it felt natural, and I loved it.

That's my story for today- I'm working on the balance of being me, while being a part of a couple- the balance of being strong on my own, while being able to lean on Joel- the balance of continuing to pursue my dreams, while also being Joel's #1 cheerleader, and of course working on building and pursuing our common dreams as well. On being a modern woman, choosing to be in the ancient institution of marriage.

What are you doing in the loo?

Today, when I got back to the classroom after lunch, my coworker was standing near one of the bathrooms- she started madly motioning for me to come to her. I wasn't really sure what this could be about, because let's face it, the kids do all kinds of things in the bathrooms, but usually, it's not something we want to show each other. We're all quite used to having the kids use the toilets with the door open, anyone pees or poops while others wash their hands- it's normal. As a teacher, you never hesitate to actually open the door a bit to see what is going on in there, who is in there, etc, because groups of girls huddle in the bathroom to hide from the boys, or to share a lipstick they have sneakily brought to school- boys tend to lock themselves in and go on to have water fights, etc. So, the bathrooms have a pretty open door policy in our classroom... and we've seen plenty...

But today, seeing what I saw, tops anything I have seen in one of our bathrooms...

I wish I had a picture.

But I don't.

Because, he was pooping. Except he wasn't. Because he was asleep. Sitting on the john. Head laid gently on his knees, arms dangling at his sides. There he slept.

We wanted to take a picture so badly, but of course, we did not. Then, my coworker decided that she should really wake him, and so she gently shook his shoulder, and asked, "Are you done?"






P.S. How do you like this new look? I love the flowers on the right side... I wish there were more instead of polka dots. But I like it. And I like how I added lots of different colors for all the headers and stuff, so it's like someone threw up a rainbow on my blog. :)

Happy Valentine's Day!

Ah, Valentine's day. Hallmark holiday? Christian holiday? American holiday? Well, I'll tell you what... I don't really care WHOSE holiday it is- I think it's nice to be reminded (especially in this fast paced world where often we DON'T take the time to really be with our special someone) to spend a day, or an evening, with the one you love. I'm not saying it has to be expensive, it's more about time to me.

Earlier this week, or maybe it was last week, Joel was thinking about booking a bus to get to the clinic on Sat the 14th, because he had another check up for his broken hand. Last time he went to the clinic, he got there around 2, and left at nearly 8. So he put it to me, that if I was willing to go with him to the clinic on that day and sit with him all the hours that he would probably end up being there, then we could go out for Chinese that night, for Valentine's Day. I was impressed that he came up with this plan (points for him!) and agreed to it.

But then, it turns out, he actually had an appointment time - at 8:30 am! So he ended up getting up early on a Saturday (for that matter so did I!)- he left school at 7:30, got to the clinic at just past 8, saw the doctor at 12, went to get an x-ray, another hour before he got that, at 1:30 the x-ray was ready, and then YAY! He got his cast off. He was home by 3. If you're interested I got up early to go for a run- 7k! (and I did it- running the whole way!) and then went into town to go shopping at a store called Jumbo. I still got home way earlier than he did.

Anyway, so then we were both home in the afternoon, took naps (I was really tired after the middle of the night blogging and the long run that morning!), and then finally got dressed for the big night out! There was one small problem though- even though he had really tried his best, Joel had not ever been able to find the phone number for the Chinese restaurant that we wanted to go to. Not even the locals could find it for him. So, when we showed up at the Chinese place all decked out, we got turned away at the door. Darn. It really stunk because, we had even talked during the ride into town about what we were going to eat, etc. We were both pretty excited about it, I'd say!

So, after being turned away, we got back in the van, and told the driver to drive further along the Ilha until we found a restaurant. We knew there were a couple Indian restaurants in the same area, and thought it would be good to try to find one of those (Indian and Chinese can be counted on for vegetarian food- other, especially Angolan/Portueguese restaurants, not so much). We finally did spot the one and Joel ran inside to ask if they had any available tables.

He came out laughing to himself and with a big smile on his face. He opened the door and said that yes, there are still tables, but, the restaurant was having a "Valentine's Dinner and Dance" for a set price of 8,500 Kwanza (or $110) a head. We thought about it, and then said, "Eh, f-it. We might not find anything else- let's just do it!" So we told the driver to "stand by" and headed inside.

Lordy, lordy- the red, the white, the gold, the hearts, the balloons, the strobe lights, the lasers, the cheesy, cheesy, bad music, the flower arrangements, the peacock feather arrangements (!)- it was all VERY over the top!

When we walked in the floor was littered with heart shaped balloons that said, "I love you", the lights were dim, and as Joel forked over the ridiculous amount of money, the maitre d' handed me a rose (yes the one pictured above). I have to say that was a nice surprise, because aside from a few flowering bush type things, you don't see flowers in Luanda. You can't buy flowers. It's almost like they don't exist here. But I got a red rose on Valentine's Day. :)

So then we sat down, and ordered drinks. I wanted white wine, Joel (trying to do it up right for such a night out, skipped the coke and) asked for red. Next thing we know, they bring us whole bottles each- one for me, one for him. They say, "Sorry, we only have bottles tonight." We were like,"Uh, but is it expensive?" And they said, "No, you already paid for everything!" Well, ok then!

We sat for a long time, and our tummies started to rumble...finally we saw some people getting up and going to the buffet- and just then, our waiter came and told us to help ourselves, so we went. I won't go into details about the food- it was Indian, had a good spread of both veg and meat items, and we both stuffed ourselves. I also had dessert, although Joel just had one cracker with cheese. It was all very good.

The waiter kept coming back and filling up our glasses when they were not nearly empty, and we both got close to drinking a whole bottle of wine. Finally, we decided to leave- Joel was getting antsy, although, it was only nearing 11, and people weren't even dancing yet- actually because Angola has the Portuguese influence, people often start their dining experience somwhere between 10 and 11- maybe even later! So, as we were leaving, there were people just still coming in. And I'm sure the bad dj eventually got some people out on the dance floor, to boogie down to the awful music.

Anyway- if you're wondering about the "I love you" heart with the two monkeys in the picture with the rose- well, that is what *I* got Joel for Valentine's Day. When I was at the store that morning, there was a variety of totally crappy stuff like that, but no nice boxes of chocolates or anything like that, so I decided, "when in Rome..." :) I told Joel he should take the heart to his classroom so he can remember how much I love him every day- and maybe so that we don't have to see it every day in our house. :)

Hope your Valentine's Day was happy too! :)

It's nearly 3:30am...

I went to bed last night around 10, after having passed out cold on the couch sometime before that... this happens on Friday nights.

But it's now nearly 3:30am, and I was woken from a really bizarre dream where I was in a car- and a slightly grown up version of one of my students was driving- we were driving from Grand Rapids (Michigan) back to Kalamazoo- but along the way, on the highway, we kept driving past high schoolers in states of random undress playing in the puddles on the highway- and by the way, the ones that were dressed, were clearly in their Prom best. I tried to get out my cell phone to call 911 and report that there were people playing on the highway, that we kept nearly hitting- but the driver had the radio on so loud, that I could not hear anything. All the buttons in the car were in totally random places, and I kept searching for the button to turn it down...and yelling at the kid driving that I couldn't hear. Then I heard the lady on the phone (the 911 lady) say, "I've been waiting for you to talk for like 2 minutes now..." and I proceeded to get in a fight with her over the fact that she should have said something LOUDLY when she picked up. Then, the kid takes an offramp, and suddenly, it's not night-time anymore like it was on the highway, and we're zooming through this little town, and she's driving WAY TOO FAST and she takes a turn that goes by an old (but still functioning) church and then it was a dead end, the end of the street blocked by big pillars, to cut this road off from being a throughway- and my student, she's like, "Let's just see if we can squeeze through here..." Of course we could not, so with reckless abandon she throws it into reverse and we back back down the street, and as we drive by backwards I see the pastor (who in my dream happened to look like a Latvian politician whose kids used to go to my old school) and some of his parishioners coming out of the church.

Then I woke up, because still, it was so LOUD. I sat up in bed, thinking, "What the hell? I'm not dreaming anymore! Why is it so loud?" We sleep with the air conditioner on, so we're used to that relatively "white" noise in the night- but this was something different. I got up out of bed, and went to the window, and realized that it is raining so hard that the sound is not of raindrops, but just the dull roar of sheets of rain coming down. I just opened the door to see how loud it sounded outside, and realize that our roof must amplify the sound. I don't know what it's made of, but, um, clearly, not a rain friendly material. There are occasional flashes of lighting, and I heard one boom of rolling thunder... but mostly, from inside here, it sounds like a fan is turned on high and blowing in your face- like the AC is up and making a lot of noise. It's really loud white noise.

But, it's funny because the sound is so dull- I want to it to separate- I want to hear the little raindrops... but I suppose, that won't for a while. In the 25 minutes it's taken me to distractedly get this down, the rain hasn't eased up at all. I wonder how long it will last. Ah well... I'll go back and listen from bed...

Living in Luanda...six months on

For some reason, maybe because it's 6 months almost to the day that we've been in Luanda, it seems time for a reflection on where I am, what impression this place leaves now, etc.

To start, my last poll is indeed inspired by the way I currently feel towards work. I was the first person to answer the poll, and yes, I chose the first answer. Having been sick for the last week, and doing basically nothing that might be classified as constructive in that time, I've basically realized that either I am incredibly lazy, overly simple and easily entertained or just THAT over my current work situation. I didn't really enjoy being sick of course, but, honestly, I wasn't THAT sick, just possibly contagious, and therefore had to stay home. So I slept, I watched tv, I surfed the net, I thought about the wedding from every direction, got in touch with the wedding planner, made some headway on a few things, I made cookies one day, I napped...but I never got bored, I have to say. Anyway, I liked it because it was calm, and peaceful- not stressful and uncertain and uncomfortable like work is right now. I do hope that things change next year- that I get to move grades, that I get to have my own classroom, and that I feel reinvigorated to be teaching.

As a side note I think that maybe I could be one of those women that quits her job to plan a wedding- not because I like to be that obsessed with the wedding, but because I could focus on it. I think part of my lack of interest in working right now is that I'm nesting- no, I'm not pregnant- but, basically the thing that interests me right now is being with Joel, planning the day that will symbolically mark the beginning of our life together, and looking towards what might happen in our lives just after that- hopefully. That's what I want to do right now. And while I am trying to carry on with life as usual, I do feel like everything else kind of pales in comparison.

Anyway... so, work is work, and that is only one part of life...

As for the rest of life here...

We generally leave campus once a week. On Tuesdays. When we go grocery shopping. Aside from money I spend on the internet buying things for the wedding, this is really the only money we spend- currently running at about $300 a week. That includes some "treat" kind of foods, but mostly, that is just what it costs.

When we go grocery shopping we go to at least two stores, sometimes three. The first stop is always the expensive shop down the street where we change money, and pick up some imported stuff- like brown rice, sour cream, soy products, taco kits, salsa. Joel buys his meat here, because it's safe, though more expensive.

After this shop we usually go to the big local grocery store. This grocery store is as big as a grocery store back home would be- the difference is in the things it sells. There are probably 5, maybe 10 different kinds of cereal. There is one kind of honey, when there is honey. You can buy either whole flats of eggs or sometimes, fairly rarely, they have boxes that hold a dozen. Eggs cannot always be counted on to be there either, therefore I buy them by the flat. The produce section looks big, but is a let down. The food that this store sells is unfortunately mostly not local- which shows in the way that it looks by the time it gets to the shelves. I walk in every time really wanting to find stuff to buy, but, unfortunately, I rarely do. On our last trip I think I bought some cucumbers, maybe potatoes. Sometimes I get carrots there, but I haven't seen any in a long time. Onions, sometimes squash, maybe a zucchini.

I am coming up against being very bored with the food here. And it's hard because mostly the food that you can get is processed, in a box, canned, dry staples (pasta, couscous, rice). I want to be healthy, and I want to eat fresh food. I do want to lose weight, and not being able to get my hands on things like greens, fresh vegetables, etc makes that hard. Because when you can't get that stuff, you end up having to do SERIOUS portion control because all those other foods are so calories dense to try to lose weight. It's frustrating.

I have already told Joel that really, really good food has to be at the top of the list for must-haves for the next place we live. Which is why Asia or South America are the top next choices.

I still have not taken a picture of the beautiful little birds that live all around here. I love to see them- their blue bellies make me unbelievably happy. And they are so cute.

I am still in love with living in the heat. Although, that said, it is easy to forget how hot it is, when you have good air conditioning. During the week that I was sick, I was on the verge of wanting to wrapped up in blankets (well I was sick!), but, that is because I didn't really leave the house- and we do keep the inside of the house comfortable. In fact, sometimes, it gets downright cold in here, and then we switch the air off and warm up again. But, I think it's normal to want to be comfortable. I still relish the fact that when I walk outside I can be warm, that the sun shines 6 out of 7 days (maybe more), and that I never have to walk through snow, slush or driving cold wind. That makes me happy. I don't miss winter.

Since being here I have been out to eat maybe 5 times- we've been to the bars once or twice each. It's not really my scene, the bar scene here. Mostly because it's one of those doesn't start until after midnight kind of scenes. But also, I don't like the fact that to get to bar you have to drive an hour, and worse, an hour to get home again (when you'd really rather just be home).

I've been to the movies twice, once with the girls, once with Joel. The movie theater is actually quite nice on the inside. You can tell it's new, and hardly used (movies aren't really the kind of thing locals can afford to spend their money on). Unfortunately, they get an odd selection of movies- not really sure who picks them. The concession stand offers stale popcorn, canned soda or beer and water. Hmm, maybe packs of gum. So, it's not quite like going to the movies back home- but that said, you can openly bring in food from the mall food court, and no one says anything. So, if you want to bring your burger and fries from Wimpy's or Bob's in, that is fine- or if you want to bring your sundae from the ice cream shop, that is fine too. I suppose then, I should just plan better the next time we go, and buy some more favorable snacks before the movie.

We do spend a bit of time with people from school on the weekends. I mean, it's hard to avoid your neighbors when you live in a place like this. Often on Friday nights someone lights up a BBQ and everyone gathers on a porch and drinks either socially or heavily. Us girls still get together to talk weddings now and then. I still meet with the book club once a month, as I mentioned not long ago. There is stuff to do, and at the same time, it's easy to get lazy, and just hang around inside. We haven't been to the beach since Joel broke his hand of course.

I guess in the end, I neither love it nor hate it here. It's a place where I am existing quite nicely for now. I cannot see it being a place where I would be tugged to stay. Latvia was hard to leave for a myriad of reasons. But Shanghai, for as difficult as it was, and for as much as I had no real ties to the place, was also hard to leave- it did seem so full of fun and possibility (aside from the one real thing I was looking for- a man). I think that when we leave Luanda, it will be easy. Of course we are here for the experience, the adventure, the possibility of travel in Africa- but I don't think it is a place that will evoke in me a deep connection. We all have our places where we feel that- some stronger than others.

Ah, I'll tell you one more thing- this morning- ok I'll tell the truth, it was after noon- on my first foray into the bathroom, I was faced with a giant dead, or rather dying, cockroach. It's not really the thing that one wants to see first thing. But, from what I am gathering, roaches die always on their backs, in places where you never see them otherwise. I am faced with roaches in this way often in the classroom- but this is the first one we've found in the house like this. I wonder, if unlike cats or dogs, who go to find a secluded, dark place to die, roaches crawl out in the open for their last breaths. Perhaps it is that roaches are terrible, unforgiving creatures, and when they see one of their own dying, they drag it out on it's back to die away from the family. Who knows.

So, that's my 6 month update. Only two months until we travel to Zambia, and have some time in South Africa again- yay for shopping. I already have a list of things to buy that you just can't get here. So, here's looking forward!

Not really sure...

No I'm not, not really sure if I like this new, quite busy look of my blog here. But, you get bored. And also, I saw my cousin Liene's new look, and I LOVED it. If I didn't know her, I would just make my blog have the same background. But alas, it would be weird if we looked exactly the same.

Anyway, so, who knows, I might change things around again soon, because, like I said, I'm just not sure about this- it's SO busy, but... well, it is what it is for now. :)

Oh, and, in case you didn't notice, living on the edge of the city won over living in the country. Waahooo!!! I will not die lonely. Of course, I don't know who actually answered that answer, but, well, I like most of my readers... ;) Just kidding! I love you all! :)

OK- one for the Smedes

I don't have a picture of my family that just includes the family of origin (well, unless you want one like 20+ years old), nor do I have one that includes only family of origin + steps. So this is what you get. :)

A favor for my family...

I just sent this image off to my family in the States. They had put in a request for some good pictures with names to be able to acquaint themselves with the Smedes clan. So I made this.

I sent it to Mook just for a laugh, and she said I had to blog it or she would. :) I guess she found it hilarious.

I think I did pretty well. It shows everyone, and tells who they are. I only missed out saying Luka's age- he's 3 and a 1/2- 4 in June right?

Maybe I should do one of these for the Smedes of my family? When was the last time my family took a family picture though? I don't remember- probably at my mother's wedding- which was well, in 2005? I guess it's good we have another wedding coming up to take another picture!

25 Things...

There is a thing, a meme (I don't know what that stands for. anyone?) or a forward going around on the good ole FB these days, where your friends write 25 things (anything!) about themselves, and then they "tag" you (yes, like in the childhood game, but they do it by writing your name, rather than slapping you). If you get tagged, then you have to write 25 things about yourself, and tag some other people. I have been tagged a lot of times, and I already wrote my 25 things long ago, because I'm a fool for such things, and goodness knows I like to write about myself.

Today, I am feeling the need to state things. Truths. Or things I would like to be truths. Or things that God forbid should be truths, but that feel the need to get out today. So, I'm going to write 25 here. If you read these 25, you can write 25 on your blog too- but I'm not going to "tag" anyone.

1. I use living abroad as an excuse to make decisions I like to think I would not make if I did not live abroad.
2. A life without sour cream might just be, a life not worth living.
3. I wish I could get dairy substitutes for products besides milk, because then, I think I could find a life worth living that didn't include real sour cream.
4. I suspect there is something markedly wrong with my guts, and that it affects the way I look physically.
5. I want to be a "family person" but I don't want to live near my family.
6. I wonder how different life would have been if one of my brothers had been a sister, if my parents didn't divorce, if we never moved away from Indianapolis. I suspect life wouldn't be measurably better, but possibly, very different.
7. Since becoming a vegetarian, I have become exceedingly adventurous with food- and I always try new things convinced I am going to like them. Usually I do.
8. I tried to like brussel sprouts. I just don't.
9. I can't wait to wear the wedding band that matches my engagement ring, to be a wife instead of a fiance, and to be married to Joel.
10. I was bit in the leg by a St. Bernard as a child, and I think the only dog I have ever felt completely safe with since, is my dad's dog Remy. She's a really, really nice dog. My brother's dog Teja doesn't count, because she's retarded and you can't be afraid of a retarded dog.
11. I think my life would be better if I had a car to be in and listen to music really loud and sing outloud really loud.
12. I take immense pleasure in watching people enojy eating food I have prepared. I don't want it to be, but food is love.
13. I judge people who misspell/misuse easy words harshly. When I see that I have made a stupid spelling/use mistake, I judge myself harshly too.
14. I sometimes smile to myself when I realize that I really am living the life I am living.
15. I have known a lot of really funny people in my life, and I miss them being around as much as I miss some of my really, really good close friends, because I love to laugh until it hurts, and I don't do it enough.
16. I never grew out of the phase that little kids go through when they are hyper-sensitive to the way clothes fit. It's not that clothes have to be comfortable, they just can't be uncomfortable in very certain ways.
17. I don't listen to music anymore, except for when Joel puts it on. I got sick of my tastes being made fun of.
18. I am sure it makes me a better person to eat green things.
19. Unlike many women, I am quite happy to wear the same shoes, carry the same bag and wear all the same jewelry pretty much every day. I own nearly 100 pairs of underwear however, and I make a really conscious choice about which pair to wear every day.
20. I really enjoy watching celebrity news and other reality shows-especially if they are about weddings or babies. I could, and do, spend entire days doing so.
21. When I get into a show, I can get so attached to some characters that I really feel like I am losing a friend when the show ends.
22. I could spend hours slowly moving through a grocery or drug store looking at every little thing on offer. Once in Latvia, I get sternly looked at and followed by a security guard for spending too much time in Drogas.
23. I'm not a person who keeps secrets. I wonder what it feels like to keep things in.
24. I think my friend AS is probably really and truly one of the best people I know. She is always giving of herself to so many different groups, yet still loves and supports her family and herself. I want to be like her when I grow up.
25. I'm really excited about my wedding, and am trying to plan it to be a fantastic event.

Am I destined for a solitary life?

OK, I know I'll always have Joel- and hopefully we'll have our kids- but, if 5 out of 6 of my friends who answered my poll (I was the 7th person) want to live in the country where they have no neighbors- then who are MY friends going to be near where I live? Wanting to live in the country, to me, is about like wanting to live in the snow year round- HA! Not going to happen!

Anyway, I know we don't live near anyone right now anyway, but, it makes me feel quite well, lonely anyway. Humph. I wish I made friends more easily.

I guess it's a sign of growing up in a way that you don't have to like all the same things as your friends. Back in the day, like in high school, even uni to some extent, you were friends because you liked the same things- the same music, the same hobby, the same sport, the same something! I guess these days, if we can drink the same wine, and chat, it doesn't really matter, huh? Used to be we could all sit around and whine about our boyfriends, but now we've all found the perfect men, well... I guess someday when my life catches up (which, let me be honest, seems to be taking eons), we'll be able to sit around and talk about the kids...

Ah well, anyway... I wish sometimes, like for this particular poll, that I could see who answered which answer. :) (If you're not answering the poll, for fear that I DO know who is answering which answer, then know, that actually I don't know, and there is no way for me to know.) I could swear that I have some friends that are city girls who want to live in the city- why haven't you answered the poll?!?

And all I have to say about all you people who want to live in the country- I hope you have every intention of doing so in a green, green, sustainable way, because the world can no longer support everyone wanting their own piece of the earth- it's too small, there are too many of us, and not enough world to go around. So be gentle with it. :)

OK I'm done.

Actually, I would just like to add again that actually I hate wedding planning. Maybe I would not if I wasn't having a destination wedding that I have to plan from too far away- but, today, I hate wedding planning. Blah. I think paper work and documents and such are the devils work. That is what I think.

**UPDATE** Oh, oh! Just as I was posting this, someone voted that they would like to live on the edge of a big city in a funky little neighborhood with me!!!! WAAAAAHOOOOOO!!! Who was it???? ;)